


the next day

by moshmxllo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Break Up, M/M, Smoking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:47:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26044444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moshmxllo/pseuds/moshmxllo
Summary: They say the worst time after a break up is the next day. It would take a long time to get rid of habits and routines. For Osamu, it’s eight long years worth of daily routines.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Miya Osamu
Comments: 5
Kudos: 39





	the next day

Picture frames thrown across the room, doors slammed, fists bleeding from punches thrown to concrete walls.

_ This is so fucking cliché. _

Words meant to hurt were said between two hearts that were once beating so wildly for the other. All the fighting, the yelling, the pointing of fingers have eventually become physically and emotionally taxing to both of them that they end up sitting on the floor, at opposite ends of the room.

No one says a word. They can only hear silent sobs and fists pounding the carpeted floor in frustration.

“What happened to us, Keiji?” Osamu meant to say to himself, but it was loud enough for Keiji to hear.

“I don’t know. I’m just.. so tired, ‘Samu. One day I woke up and I felt empty. I didn’t feel the same way I did before.” Keiji says, with his eyes still on the floor.

Osamu looks at him. He tries to look at him through eyes filled with tears, “Wh- the fuck does that even mean??”

Next thing he knew, Keiji was already carrying his luggage on his way out of their apartment door. Osamu realizes that if Keiji had enough time to pack his things up, this wasn’t a spur of the moment decision.

_ Since when? How did I not notice? What did I do wrong? _

He spent all night trying to find answers to a thousand questions running through his head.

\--

Osamu wakes up from his slumber. He checks the time - it’s only 4:39AM. He can’t remember how he fell asleep. His head was throbbing and his eyes were burning.

He reaches for the space next to him in bed and finds it empty. 

“Keiji!” he sits up in his panic, and the throbbing in his head got even worse from the sudden movement.

“Love-” the endearment was caught in his throat when he remembers.

_ Fuck- no. This is just a bad dream _ .

Osamu slaps himself awake, and the sting on his cheeks confirmed that this isn’t a dream. He’s definitely awake, and Keiji’s no longer in his life.

He looks around the room and sees how trashed their -  _ his _ apartment was. Shards of glass scattered on the floor, little spots of blood on the wall, furniture disarranged, and the ghost of Keiji lingering in this space they used to share.

\--

[5:05am]  **_Osamu_ ** : Good morning, love.

[5:05am]  **_Osamu_ ** : I’m sorry ‘bout last night. I didn’t mean any of those things that I said. I’ll make it up to ya, I promise.

[5:06am]  **_Osamu_ ** : Can we meet up?

[5:07am]  **_Osamu_ ** : Will ya come home to me, Keiji?

_ Read 5:11am _

*

12 missed calls from Osamu

*

[7:47am]  **_Keiji_ ** : We’re broken up, Osamu. That’s not my home anymore.

_ * _

_ You are no longer allowed to send messages to this number. _

\--

They say the worst time after a break up is the next day. It would take a long time to get rid of habits and routines. For Osamu, it’s eight long years worth of daily routines.

The morning after, he made breakfast good enough for two. He had to physically stop himself from taking two coffee cups from the cupboard. He had to consciously remind himself that he’s no longer living with the love of his life.

It just gets tougher as the day progresses. There were times when he finds himself crying in the middle of doing his chores, because in all those years of being with Keiji, these are things that they do together.  _ Used to do together _ , he makes a mental note.

Many times throughout the day he tries to reach out to Keiji through every channel he knows - text, calls, his social media accounts, even through his family and friends. But he was blocked on all of them. He wants to go to him, but he doesn’t know where he is. He considers knocking on the doors of everyone they know just so he could find him, but he immediately shuts down the idea. He freezes in place at the thought of Keiji pushing him away for the second time.

He was lost, frustrated, and desperate to bring him back. All his anger from last night came back to him and he wants to blame Keiji for fucking up their relationship. He didn’t even get a clear answer as to why he left him, so why did he let him leave? Why couldn’t he stop him from leaving?

\--

He finds a pack of cigarettes that Keiji left on the table next to the bed that they used to share. He didn’t even know that Keiji’s smoking again.  _ Since when? _ He asks himself again and again.

Osamu had already quit smoking too when he started dating Keiji. But now there are storms brewing in his head and his heart that he can’t keep a clear mind. He goes to the balcony and lights a cigarette. His first one in eight years.

The first puff made his chest feel tight and he immediately started coughing, but he knows that the pain would only last for a few minutes, and he’ll get used to the smoke and nicotine entering his system again. He feels lightheaded, but he smokes until the ember reaches the filter so he can light another one.

Osamu sits on the floor of the balcony and thinks about what happened the night before. He regrets saying the words he said. He regrets not holding him. He regrets not chasing after him when he was about to leave.

But most of all, he regrets not giving enough attention to the little details.

He did not notice how Keiji’s personal belongings have been disappearing little by little. He did not notice how Keiji has been less intimate with him. He did not notice how  _ he _ has been less intimate. He did not notice that the space between them when they lay in bed was gradually getting bigger and bigger.

He never noticed how the fire in their hearts that used to burn so big and so bright was slowly dying out.

He did not notice when it all began, so he was left alone in the end.

_ Since when, Keiji? When did’ya start falling out of love? _

Osamu lights the last cigarette from the pack that Keiji left. This is the last of him that he’ll be able to hold, so he keeps the empty carton close to his heart.

He goes back inside and lays on his bed. The bed that suddenly feels so big, knowing that Keiji will never be lying next to him anymore. He’s left alone with even more questions that he may never have the answers to.

Osamu closes his eyes and wishes that when tomorrow comes, Keiji will love him again.

**Author's Note:**

> finishing a pretty heavy movie and listening to "Anino" by Up Dharma Down made me write this.  
> I love OsaAka so much that I want to hurt them :)
> 
> talk to me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/kkodzukenn) or [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/kkodzukenn)!


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